If the answer to ANY of the following questions is NO then that’s also your answer…
1 – Are you financially stable? You don’t need to be balling out of control, but are you able to pay your own way?
2 – Is he/she financially stable? See above
3 – Have you been away together for at least a week? Stayed in the same hotel room, had some insight into how the other lives?
4 – Are you secure in your relationship? No trust issues, happy, not worried about outside influence?
If the answer to any of the above is NO. Then NO you’re not ready to live together in my honest opinion and here’s why.
To me, the biggest mistake you can make above all else is to move in with someone or move someone in with you when the BOTH of you are not financially secure as individuals. It’s all good you being financially secure, or your partner being financially secure but if there isn’t harmony on that front BEFORE you take the step to do something as huge as moving in with eachother then you’re setting yourself up for failure. It’s known that finance is one of the biggest strain causes for relationships, even when people have their shit together; so imagine how horrendous it will get when one of you is eating food they don’t have the means to bring to the table.
Going away with your partner is a great way to find out exactly who they are by how they live. If you’re a neat freak and they’re not, you’re going to notice at some point. Whilst it may seem really trivial to be that concerned about seemingly small things “oh she leaves her shit everywhere”, it’s not because it’s an indication of how she lives. If you are polar opposites; no it’s not impossible for it to work out in a living arrangement but at least you know what you’re going into and you can be prepared.
Security. People think that when you move in with someone that will eradicate insecurities and fears you have about where they are and what they’re doing. WRONG. It actually does the opposite. Why? Because all that will happen is every time that person leaves the house, stays out a little late, doesn’t come home when they said, took too long to get home from work; it will send your mind on a wild goose chase. Trust cannot be built by force. Moving in with someone to attempt to build trust is force because no matter what if you don’t trust that person, when they leave the house that doubt will always be there!
Plus moving in with someone makes the relationship seem so much older than it’s years. 3 years feels like 15years and when you’re young and still have a lot of living to do, that breeds resentment and a relationship that was otherwise perfect, otherwise meant to be…can fall flat on it’s face because you took it somewhere it wasn’t ready to be!